Why didn't they tell me?

When I was pregnant everyone told me that the swing would be my best friend. That baby would LOVE the swing and it'd save my life with a cranky baby on more than one occasion. Too bad my child hates the swing. We originally registered for the Fisher Price Lamb Swing but soon after Fisher Price recalled a shit ton of their products. Of course being new expecting parents (and thus making us overly paranoid) we took that swing off our registry and added this:



Mr G and I were all, "OMG! It's got an iPod adaptor! And it doubles as a bouncy seat! SWEET!" Too bad our child feels that this expensive piece of supposed baby love is some form of ancient chinese torture. I blame it on the positioning of the seat. It doesn't seem very comfortable and L didn't fit into properly until she was roughly 9lbs. Every now and then we'll test the swing out and I'll get about 10-15 minutes of freedom before she starts screaming.... and I mean screaming.

Oh, she also spits out pacifiers.

So this is where I go all don't expect your kid to like everything because they won't and I wish someone would've honest with me. There are also a lot of 'baby gimmicks' - i.e. those swaddle blankets (the ones that look like a straight jacket) and in my opinion bouncy seats. We had a bouncy seat, opened it when L was about a month old and returned it because she was already too big. What I do know is my Moby wrap is a God send and Aden and Anais swaddleplus blankets are amazing. I wish I had splurged on a BugaBoo instead of thinking that the PegPerego with the bassinet already attached was easier (oh, and PS - while I LOVE our PegPerego carseat... that MotherEffer is so heavy. Like ridiculously heavy). So, for those mommies I know who just found out they are expecting ... if you want my advice, register for the basics and go with the flow. Ask for gift cards and don't open everything you get when you get it. Half you won't use. And if you are having a girl ... be prepared to get clothes and almost only clothes. I mean, admit it ... buying a highchair isn't nearly as much fun as buying a pink frilly pair of Juciy baby PJs.