A little taste of things to come.

The insanity called life.

Every day is something new. Life is unexpected. It greets us every morning with a mischievous grin and turns on it's heels to plot it's next move. Life keeps us on our toes. Busy with existing we fall into the in-between of sitting idle and simply surviving.

I have found lately my in-between is occupied by (with) a 20lb 12 month old who refuses to walk and has more attitude than her 13 year old cousin. It is comprised of naps, silly cartoons, and singing the ABCs while sitting on the floor.

As I listen to her gentle breath and hold her tiny body against mine I wonder if I will ever again feel the warmth of another child. My heart feels selfish for asking, for thinking... But it yearns for the tiny touch of little fingers wrapped around mine.

In the end, I must remember that life is unforseen - it has it's magical ways of surprising and delighting. & even though old issues arise they do not shape me, for I have fought them once before..& life will amaze me once again.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Despite probably not being able to taste anything (thank you to a head cold), I'm very excited for dinner! We're in NY at my older sister's house and thoroughly enjoying the 40 degree weather.

I hope that everyone who reads this little blog has a Thanksgiving full of family, fun, and food. ❤

DIY

Craft skill level: baller

Like Jessie Spano

You know. In the one episode where Zach finds no-dose in her backpack. Then she's all, "I'm so excited!!!!! I'm so scared!!!! There's no time! There's never enough time!!!"

That's me. Right now.

That crazy time of year.

When the shiz hits the fan between making holiday plans, planning a birthday party, a trip to Disney, and a move all in the next month.

Let's break it all down. First Layla's birthday is exactly a week from today {cue hyperventilation}. That means her party is roughly 10 days away. WHA? {cue more hyperventilation} There's still so much to do. Order food. Finish getting decorations. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc..........

On top of that we're moving into an awesome little condo while we are looking for a house (bc currently we're at my parents and I feel like a vagabond). My BFF owns it(she also happens to be an FABULOUS realtor) & is letting us stay there while we look for a forever home. Since we want to get the most for our money we'll be looking for short sales or foreclosures & that process can take a longgggg time. We're in for the long haul here and uber excited to start searching. We move on the 15.

IN THE MEAN TIME..... We're set to go to NY for Thanksgiving. We're leaving Wednesday or Thursday. Layla has no winter clothes (remember, we live in SoFla?), and while that gives me an excuse to shop, it adds another thing on the endless to-do list.

THEN.... There's Disney on the 9th (possibly 8th if Mr G needs to go up for work)-11th. I'm actually taking a break from researching hotels for the night of the 9th. We get a free room at the Yacht and Beach Club (Thank you to Mr G's job!) the night of the 10th. So far I've booked two character dining experiences and the Very Merry Christmas Parade. HOLLA. All this money & I'm sure Layla is going to cry as soon as she sees The Mouse. Either way, free hot chocolate and cookies? Yes, please.

So, I'm sitting at the kitchen table watching RHOBH reruns on DVR and breathing into a paper bag. I also apologize to my bank account in advance. & to those that may not receive Christmas gifts because we spent too much at the happiest place on Earth.

Arts & crafts

Maybe I'm not totally creatively challenged. What a relief.

Thanks to Pinterest I've got a few arts and crafts and ideas up my sleeve for LG's bday. So after work yesterday the baby bug and I took a trip to Home Depot and Michaels in an attempt to make me look like I know what the heck I'm doing. On the agenda were three terra cotta pots and paint.

$8.22 cents later I felt like a budgeting, creative badass. I took my three pots and painted them green, ivory and pink to match Layla's birthday colors. I got the paint on sale for $1 for 2!

Now can you guess what's going to go inside these pretty pots??

Chinese torture device.

In the last few weeks Layla went from being a happy kid in her carseat to screaming in it like its a torture chamber. This makes driving AWESOME. Nothing keeps her occupied and I've has more than a few bottles, toys and sippy cups throw at my head. Blasting her favorite music (which includes Foster the People, Adele and Rhianna) only occupies her for about .657 seconds when before I could put Adele on repeat and she'd dance in her carseat until she fell asleep.

Maybe this is my first taste of toddlerhood. I don't know. What I do know is this nonsense has to stop and I don't know how to stop it. All my mommy gut attempts have failed. Help?

Any other moms out there with advice? Beside turning the music up and ignoring her... Because that's pretty much where I am now.

For the win.

Because my life isn't hilarious enough.

I left the house this afternoon im my slippers. No, seriously. & I didn't do this on purpose. I swear. I may or may not have finished my errands in Ugg slippers in 80* weather while wearing a sun dress.

And to complete my silly afternoon of baby free running around in wool slippers? A hot gingerbread latte.

Then there was cake.

Boredom mixed with Pinterest and a craving to bake ends in pumpkin spice cake and banana bread.

Pinterest had an awesome recipe with a boxed yellow cake and can of pumpkin. I turned it up a notch by adding ginger, nutmeg, cinnamon, and all spice to give it that pumpkin spice flavor. The pumpkin gave the cake a light, fluffy, moist texture. Sooo good.

Then I realized we had over-ripped bananas and I figured, "hey! Banana bread! Why not?" so then I made banana bread.

Now the house smells like Thanksgiving and I'm sitting on the couch wishing it was 60* instead of 85*. Ah such is life.

Christmas a little early.

Two weeks ago a local photog who has taken pictures of a few of our events (including Layla's newborn photos) had mini sessions for Christmas. Of course I got in on that merry, jolly business and headed over to the beach (YES. the beach. remember we live VERY south) to meet Santa and take pictures.

Obviously you can tell by certain photos that we don't have to deal with snow, but we did sweat our asses off. & I'm sure there was more than one picture of me squinting from the sun, which is just sexy.

p.s the 2nd is my favorite but I think it was post meeting Santa for the first time & her facial expression says.it.ALL.

The first step out the door.

It's always the most difficult, but I never regret it.

My run tonight straight up sucked. I knew in my first .15 of a mile that the next 4.75 would be nothing short of hard. And they were. And I struggled. And I ran 12+ minute miles. And each step was more painful than the next. But... I ran. I kept going until my body gave out around the 3.5 mile mark. When my feet were heavy and I limped back home. I hated that I had to stop but reminded myself that I already got through the hardest part: getting out the door. So I took my 3.73 in 46 minutes and said, "okay. I'll do better tomorrow." And I will. I'll lace up my sneakers tomorrow like every other day and put every ounce that I have into those miles. Whether 2, 3, or 6... There's one thing I know I can do: get out the door, and that's half the battle.

Crib sheet -1. Tess -0.

There are few things in motherhood as difficult as changing a crib sheet while the mattress is on the lowest setting.

That damn crib sheet makes me feel like I fail at life. Seriously. I tuck under one side only for the other to pop up. WTF, crib sheet? Go ahead test my mommy skills why don't you.

So I pull the entire crib off the wall and get down to business. Lifting the crib bumper up and then the mattress and tucking that mothereffer of a sheet so far under the mattress it thinks it bought a one way ticket to mattress Australia. Don't mess with me crib sheet!

After fighting for a good 20 minutes and being more winded then when I run 5 miles, the crib sheet is on. I win! Until I realize that shit isn't on tight enough.... But it's on. Hahaha. I'm in denial - the crib sheet is mocking me.

I'll get you, sheet. One day. One day.

That time of year.

9pm. Quiet light filters the room. The smells of apple cider with mullen spices makes me nostalgic, and for a split second, when I close my eyes, I watch the wonder of my own childhood during this magical time of year.

As Layla lies next to me, her body still with sleep, I can't help but think what the holidays are going to look like through her eyes. The sheer joy, wonder and excitement that Christmas is about. I'm excited to have the privilege to experience what her life holds.





(ps sorry for the saptastic posts lately. My noodle is going to be a year old and I'm having a bit of a time coming to terms.)

November

So here we are. 16 days (not including today) till Layla's first birthday. We're just two weeks away and I'm already having heart palpitations. She is the most fabulous thing in my life and I still find myself looking at her and sincerely thinking, "wow. I get to keep her." Its that part of parenthood that never goes away. That feeling of undeniable love that fills your heart with overwhelming emotion. And there will always be a part of my heart that wishes she'd fit snugly and safely in my arms forever.