#motherhood

Every now and then you realize you're a parent and think to yourself holyeffingshit who thought THAT was a good idea?

The awkward moments of motherhood help those realizations. You know, the awkward moment when there's a brown smudge on your shirt and you think to yourself... Is that chocolate or poop? And because you're a mom and shit (literally and figuratively) doesn't bother you anymore, you smell said smudge and realize.. Haha! It's just chocolate! And go about your business singing the theme song to The Wonder Pets while folding laundry.

Speaking of The Wonder Pets... I found myself today watching them while L was in the kitchen tearing apart my newly & neatly stacked tupperwear cabinet. But I had to freaking find out what happened to the baby skunk under the fucking rose bush because I'm COOL LIKE THAT.

Then to save my sanity I turn on Jersey Shore reruns and over comes L and props herself infront of the TV just as Snooki gets into bed with Vinny. Parenting win. Win win win.

Who gave me permission to own a child?